Invincible Summer

by NJG

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

An Ode to Queer Animals Among Us.

last week my mother offered me $100 if i would look at a youtube video she'd sent me via email.
At first i told her i'd thrown it away, thinking it was right-wing-propagandha. she assured me it was not that, and was, in fact, "Hilarious, Nickie!"
wanting a hundred dollars,
i retrieved said video from my trash folder and watched it.

The email started
"A hard look at where we are headed today! What is this world coming to?"

And attached was the video (see below). It was a humorous country song in the vein of "i'm my own grandpa" or jeff foxworthy, and basically, the theme was

Homosexuality is Unnatural. Just Look At The Animal Kingdom.

the main character begins by sitting on the couch watchin' t.v. and seeing something about a wedding.
but something was wrong! (wait for it...)
the wedding photos showed only ......two GROOMS!
this caused him to look to the barn for answers.

the video enforced that if chickens were gay there'd be no eggs (not true) , on and on.

"two mares can't make a stallion, two bulls can't make a cow,
it takes a male and female to make the species go on,
there'll be no reproduction if the plumbin' is all wrong."

oh brother!

Hi Mom, D, & L,

That video is really offensive.

there are gay animals:

attached is a photo of two gay animals, one of which is your DAUGHTER!

after receiving only chuckling responses from all parties ("there must be something in the water"), I started investigating gay animals further and found out there is an amazing list from which to choose!
take a look!

And so, in response to all of this, the 2009 Invincible Summer calendar will be dedicated to the queer animal kingdom. all clean, like usual, sometimes romantic.

I can't wait!


p.s. if you would like to see the video my mom sent me, you can look here:


carrot quinn said...

Am stalking you, via blog. I posted things too. I like to read what you write on this thing.

Photos By Nathan Backous said...

I love these two well thought out anti-gay arguments.

1. Gays cant make babies! (wrong)

I guess wasn't aware of the massive underpopulation problem that homosexuals were responsible for.

2. Animals don't do it (wrong), we shouldn't either (wrong)!

Solution: we should close all hospitals and schools, stop reading (including the bible), stop all agricultural practices, cease recording history, and no longer eat tater-tots.

Veronica said...

Wow....that video is downright HILARIOUS in its RIDICULOUSNESS. I especially love the face the old guy makes when he kind of rolls his eyes and shakes his head.... wow. Its really kind of scary that some people believe that garbage.

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